Diary of a Mount Isa summer

  • howdy folks,

    I dunno whether this has been posted already or not, but it´s that funny that I´ve spilled my coffe all over the keyboard when I´ve read it for the first time.

    Diary of a Mount Isa Summer (by a Pom)

    August 31st

    Just got transferred with work into our new home in Mount Isa, Queensland!!
    Now this is a city that knows how to live!! Beautiful
    sunny days and warm balmy evenings. What a place! I watched the sunset from
    a deck chair on the verandah It was beautiful. I've finally
    found my home. I love it here.

    September 13th:

    Really heating up. Got to 35 today. Not a problem. Live in an
    air-conditioned home, drive an air-conditioned car.
    What a pleasure to see the sun everyday like this. I'm turning into a sun
    worshiper.
    Had the backyard landscaped with tropical plants today. Lots of palms and
    rocks. What a breeze to maintain. No more mowing lawn for me.
    Another scorcher today, but I love it here.

    October 10th

    The temperature hasn't been below 35 all week. How do people get used to
    this kind of heat? At least today it's kind of windy though. But
    getting used to the heat is taking longer than I expected.


    October 15th:

    Fell asleep by the pool. Got 3rd degree burns over 60% of my body. Missed 3
    days of work. What a dumb thing to do. I learned my lesson though. Got to respect the ol' sun in a climate like this.


    October 20th:

    I missed Kitty (our cat) sneaking into the car when I left this morning. By
    the time I got to the hot car for lunch, Kitty had died
    and swollen up to the size of a shopping bag and stank up the $3,000 leather
    upholstery. I told the kids that she ran away. The car now
    smells like Wiskettes and cat shit. I learned my lesson though. No more
    pets in this heat.


    October 25th:

    The wind sucks. It feels like a giant fuckin blow dryer!! And it's hot as
    hell. The home air-conditioner is on the blink and the AC repairman charged $200 just to drive over and tell me he needed to order
    parts.


    October 30th:

    Been sleeping outside by the pool for 3 nights now. Bloody $300,000 house
    and we can't even go inside. Why did I ever come here?


    November 4th:

    It's 38 degrees. Finally got the ol' air-conditioner fixed today. It cost
    $500 and gets the temperature down to 25, but the bloody
    humidity makes the house feel like it's about 30. Stupid repairman. I hate
    this stupid fuckin place.


    November 8th:

    If another wise arse cracks, "Hot enough for you today?" I'm going to
    fuckin throttle him. Fuckin heat! By the time I get to work the car's radiator was boiling over, my clothes are soakin fuckin wet, and I
    smell like baked cat!!

    November 9th:

    Tried to run some messages after work. Wore shorts, and sat on the black
    leather seats in the ol' car. I thought my
    fuckin arse was on fire. I lost 2 layers of flesh and all the hair on the
    back of my legs and my
    fuckin arse. Now my car smells like burnt hair, fried arse, and baked
    cat.


    November 10th:

    The weather report might as well be a fuckin recording. Hot and sunny. Hot
    and sunny. Hot and fuckin sunny.
    It's been too hot to do anything for 2 damn months and the weatherman says it
    might really warm up next week. Doesn't it ever rain in this damn
    fuckin place? Water rationing will be next, so my $2,000 worth of palms
    just
    might dry up and blow into the fuckin pool. Even the palms
    can't live in this fuckin heat.

    November 14th:

    Welcome to HELL!!! Temperature got to 41 today. Now the air-conditioner's
    gone in my car. The repairman came to fix it and
    said, "Hot enough for you today?" My wife had to spend the $2,500 mortgage
    payment to bail my arse out of jail for assulting the stupid
    fucker. Fuck Mount Isa! What kind of a sick demented fuckin idiot would
    want to live here?

    December 1st:
    WHAT????? This is the first day of Summer???? You are fuckin kiddin

Jetzt mitmachen!

Sie haben noch kein Benutzerkonto auf unserer Seite? Registrieren Sie sich kostenlos und nehmen Sie an unserer Community teil!